


And Then There Was Bucky

by ButterflyBunny



Series: Avengers' Infinite Playlist [2]
Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Remembers, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-27
Updated: 2015-12-27
Packaged: 2018-05-09 16:09:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,431
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5546732
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ButterflyBunny/pseuds/ButterflyBunny
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bucky had been hiding while he figures himself out. But with Christmas coming he can't help but wish he could give Steve a present.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Then There Was Bucky

_[(Behind Blue Eyes – The Who)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BfuWXRZe9yA) _

 

Winter in New York had turn the nights colder than they used to be decades ago. He walked the streets looking at the buildings that stood so much higher that before, hugging himself and trying to his best to not make eye contact with anyone. It had been like that for the past year, every since HYDRA went down, thank Steve for that, and he was able to go under radar for enough time for them to stop looking for him. Or for anyone to stop looking for him for that matter.

The small apartment he kind of owned wasn’t far from the beautiful part of the city, plus it was the most comfortable place he had been in a long time.

He didn’t own many furniture, an old couch a coffee table and a mattress on the floor. If he stayed very quiet, which he normally did, he could fall asleep listening to the faint sound of the television from next door. And if he was lucky enough, he wouldn’t have nightmares.

The memories hit him from time to time. Lately more often than ever. It was like his life was a puzzle and someone gave him the pieces little by little and something inside of him told him that soon he would have a complete picture. He boiled water on the stove and filled the old tub on his bathroom with it, then poured half cold water. He liked to submerge under the water for a long time, being under water brought him certain sense of calm.

The days weren’t as hard as the nights were on him. He liked walking around the city, specially lately, with all the christmas decorations adorning the streets. A few months after he first saw the Captain America museum exhibition he had gotten a job, he had to pay the bills somehow, that hadn’t change. It wasn’t much of a hard job, more like helping an old man out on his antique shop. He liked to think he had gotten it because he look trust worthy enough, but truly, it looked like the old man had given him the job because he thought he was some kind of injured veteran. The fact that he rarely used his left arm might have something to do with that, but he didn’t really want to clear that up. It was all fine until one day, while he smoked on the back he heard a familiar voice.

“Here we are” A man entered a store.

“It looks nice”

Bucky’s heart stopped when he realised it was Steve, opening the glass doors for the older man he was with.

Tony Stark.

Ironman, his brain supplied.

Bucky threw the cigarette on the floor and kicked some snow into it. Mr. Albert, his boss, called his name and he didn’t know if to answer.

“Pepper suggested it” Tony Stark mentioned to Steve, “Opening doors for a man it’s weird”

“I think it’s nice” Steve shrugged, and Bucky would have chuckle if his throat didn’t feel so tight.

“James!” Albert grabbed his shoulder, he jumped and the man smiled, “Those are the costumers I told you about”

He had mentioned something about his close friend sending some costumers the day before. Mrs. Virginia Hogan, who often visited the store, looking for antiques or trinkets. He had never met her but for what Albert said she seemed like a nice dame.

“Listen, I am going to take care of this” Albert said, noticing the young man seemed lost in thought.

“I…”

Albert smiled at him and pulled a few bills from his pockets, “Look, go to the park-“

“No, no, no” Bucky shook is head, “I can’t accept-“

“It’s alright, son” Albert smiled, “Go get a pretzel and some coffee and you can come back tomorrow”

Bucky pressed his lips and accepted the money, promising himself he would pay him back somehow. The old man smiled and left.

He knew that Steve was friends with Tony Stark. Still, it had been odd to see them together like that. The way Tony stared at Steve, touched him and the way Steve responded.

He smiled softly to himself.

It was almost as if they were a couple, buying Christmas decorations together.

He sat on the park with a pretzel in his flesh hand and a large coffee in the _other_ one. He rarely stared at it, he would like to think of it as a ghost limb but it had been a while since he had looked at it with disgust. He though of it as the hand that pulled Steve out of the water and saved him from the definite fate.

Suddenly, his head was filled with memories of his pasts christmas. Sometimes he didn’t know what caused the flashbacks, but this time he was sure it had been because of Steve. He remembered when he was much younger, a kid really, ten or eleven years old, watching his mother talking with Steve’s on the small kitchen from their apartment.

_“The doctors are surprised he recovered” Steve’s mother, Sara, said, taking a sip form her cup of tea._

_Cinnabon, his mother loved it._

_“I’m telling you, that kid is a fighter” His mother answered._

_It was christmas eve and Steve had been sick for about a month._

_He was always sick, specially during winter, it was so normal from him that Bucky didn’t get nervous anymore, he knew his friend always pulled through. He went to Steve’s room and found him sitting on the floor, he sat next to him._

_“What happened?” Bucky asked._

_“My mom is sad because there isn’t money for presents” Steve explained, he sounded angry, mostly at himself._

_“Who cares about the presents” Bucky said, nudging his friend’s shoulder, his mother had told him she had lend money to them for Steve’s medicines, “I tell you what” Bucky said, “Let’s get presents ourselves”_

_Steve looked at him, “With what money?” Bucky rolled his eyes and smiled, “We don’t buy them, we get them”_

_“We can’t steal, Buck!” Steve scolded._

_“I’m not saying that!” Bucky said, “We can just trade stuff we have but we don’t want”_

_“You mean like… trinkets” Steve said._

_Bucky nodded and smiled. Steve chuckled and nodded at him._

Bucky finished his pretzel and walked to his apartment. He always saw on his way from Albert’s Emporium the Avengers Tower. As far as he knew, Steve had been living there for quite a while. Maybe he could leave a christmas present for him, just to let him know he was well.

 

* * *

 

A few days later, he was cleaning the store before it closed. Albert had left a box full of old stuff so he would get rid of it. The man repaired broken clocks and occasionally, when they could not be fixed he got rid of them. Bucky closed the store and took the box to the back, he was about to throw it to the garbage when a small crinkle called his attention.

The compass was old and scratched, the needle was missing and it didn’t work, it looked like it hadn’t work for a long time. He kept it in the pocket of his coat while he walked to the nearest dinner to get christmas dinner.

The Avengers tower caught his attention.

There was a line of cars and people taking pictures on the entrance. Some kind of party was taking place.

“I can only imagine the kind of parties those Avengers throw” And old man stood next to him, looking up at the tower.

Bucky nodded, “Yeah”

“And to think we are standing as close to Captain America than we will ever be” he added, Bucky frowned, the old man pointed at the building, “Floor 112” the man said.

“How do you know that?” Bucky asked.

The old man shrugged, “Everyone knows that!” he smiled widely.

“Oh”

The old man clapped his back, “Have a merry Christmas, son”

“Merry Christmas” Bucky waved at the man.

He looked back at the tower. It was, in fact the closer he could be to Steve at the moment. He missed him, of course, but Bucky knew there was a lot of thing he needed to sort out by himself before he could talk with Steve, he squeezed the old compass in his front pocket, that didn’t mean he couldn’t give his friend a small christmas present.

He nodded, “I think I could climb about one hundred twelve floors”

 

 

_"But my dreams they aren't as empty as my conscience seems to be"_


End file.
